The Test
by Tianaki
Summary: Maybe it should be rated 'R', I don't know. I'm sorry if it's not funny! Summary: This is also known as 'Dilly and his DragonSlayers accidentally takes a lil' trip to the Mystic Moon.'


Disclaimer: I own nothing (except maybe the plot).

(2:00 p.m. Gaea)

Hitomi held out her pendant. "Are you sure?" she asked Van.

The young Fanalian king nodded. "You should try. But don't go there yourself yet. Have those group of men – " he waved to the five men standing politely and patiently behind them – "go first. If it works, then we can make another plan."

"But what if – "

"It's okay," Van reassured the girl. "Just do your best."

"Alright."

Hitomi closed her eyes and concentrated. The pendant began to glow.

"YOU IDOITS!" Dilandau yelled at his DragonSlayers. He grabbed a hold of a couple and slapped them. "WHAT WERE YOU DOING? SLEEPING?!" 

Dilandau whipped out his flamethrower to scare his soldiers, and smirked as they cringed back. He didn't bother to aim, just shoot – 

(10:00 p.m. Earth)

A car burst into flames. The DragonSlayers looked around in confusion. 

"Wasn't it the afternoon?"

"Where are we?"

"What's that?"

"How come the people are dressed like that?"

Dilandau was oblivious to the DragonSlayers' babbling. He was in heaven. The thing his flamethrower had shot was burning magnificently. The fire…

"YES! BURN!" Dilandau crackled.

The owner of the car ran toward the scene. "My car! What happened? Who did this?"

Dilandau crowed at the sight, and aimed his flamethrower again.

I think we all know what happened.

"Lord Dilandau, I think we should try finding – "

"Hey!" a policeman yelled. "You there! Freeze!"

"Let's go, sir!" Migel and Chesta dragged their leader away from the policeman. They were all unarmed, and only Dilandau had a weapon – his flamethrower.

The DragonSlayers ran several blocks. Dilandau still managed to torch some more cars. 

Gatti managed to find a rusted door, and prayed it was abandoned as he burst it opened.

All the DragonSlayers scrambled in. One shut the door. 

It was not empty.

The girls in there squealed. "These must be the new guys!" one screamed.

"Look! They're dressed in medieval clothing! Cute, don't you think?"

The DragonSlayers stared at the skimpy-dressed girls. 

(3:00 p.m. Gaea)

Hitomi broke out into mild perspiration. Van stared at the girl, then back at the group of men. He didn't dare interrupt Hitomi to tell her the five guys were still here. 

He dismissed the group.

(12:00 a.m. Earth)

Half the DragonSlayers, including Dilandau, Gatti, Migel, Chesta, Viole, Dalet, and Guimel, were onstage. They were dancing to the music.

Apparently, they were a bit drunk.

They were also stripping.

The other half (a.k.a. the ones who have unknown names) were flirting and making out with the girls there.

They were also a bit drunk.

The girls squealed and hooted and did anything they could to encourage the ones onstage.

The vests they wore were off.

Shirts were unbuttoning.

They were off.

Now, due to training as the most elite group of soldiers in Zaibach, it was not surprising that they had all well-toned bodies.

The girls encourage some more.

Unfortunately, the police decided to burst in at this time.

"Hands up! ID cards out, now!"

The DragonSlayers chose that moment to pass out.

One of the policemen looked at the guys. "Hey, Josh, aren't these the guys that blew up all those cars?"

The one called Josh came over. "Medieval clothing, fifteen, sixteen, of them, about fifteen years of age. Yup, that's them, alright."

"Are we lucky today or what?"

They took out handcuffs, and as they were about to use them, the fifteen DragonSlayers, along with Dilandau, disappeared.

"Wha – what happened?"

"Spoke too soon," he muttered as he shook his head.

(4:30 p.m. Gaea)

Hitomi's pendant stopped glowing as Hitomi collapsed. Van caught her. "Are you alright?" he asked worriedly.

Hitomi gave him a weak smile. "Yes. Just – a bit tired, that's all. Did it work?"

"I – I think so."

"What?"

"Well, the men didn't disappear, but your pendant glowed, so I think _someone_ went to the Mystic Moon. But we'll never know."

Hitomi sighed.

(6:00 p.m. Gaea) 

Folken was sent to search for the DragonSlayers and their leader. 

He was not happy.

"Where the hell did they go?" he muttered.

Suddenly, he heard several moans that sounded suspiciously like – 

He found the missing DragonSlayers in question.

Along with their leader.

They seemed to be having terrible hangovers.

Folken had a couple himself, but from the look on the DragonSlayers' faces, theirs seems to be ten times worst.

They were also half-naked.

Well, one half was completely half-naked. The other half simply has unbuttoned shirts.

He looked at Dilandau. 

The DragonSlayer's eyes snapped open.

Miraculously, his flamethrower was still with him.

But he didn't seem to have a hangover – more like a hallucination.

Undecipherable words streamed from Dilandau as he ran around, half-naked, burning everything in sight with his flamethrower.

Folken caught some words – "Van, sluts, cars," – whatever 'cars' are. 

He looked at the DragonSlayers, then their leader, then back at them. 

"You all have a lot of explaining to do."

He received more groans and moans.

A/N: For those of you who know my age *winces*, now you know why this sucked! So, if you must flame, flame away. But, please, profanity is not a good way to flame me. A simple "That was one of the worst piece of writings I've ever read" would work. If you feel you cannot express yourself without using profanity, then please spare me. Also, if I messed up someone's personality, you can tell me that, too. I apologize for the sick, perverted, twisted, demented pea-sized thing I call a brain.

One question, though: Is Prince Chid really Allen's son in the original Escaflowne? Just curious! ^_^


End file.
